Random Poem
by Fordy, Susan, and Doghouse
Any one here?
Was the question.
Was there an answer?
Or even a mention?
"Present" I proclaim,
What about the others?
From the dead (this group) can we reclaim?
I hope so, if I had my druthers.
And with that comes are very good question
I have often wondered about your druthers
Did you simply inherit them,
Of did you steal them from the Mudders?
If he stole them does that make him a thief of genetics,
robbing DNA from sisters and cousins and mothers?
Or are his druthers just fake, like a can of cosmetics
and his choices simply lifted from the minds of some others?
I think she ment Mudders, miners with the milk,
With the Hero of Canton, a man they called Jayne,
(Though, not v ery reputable, men of his ilk),
And I wouldn't steal, from that I abstain.
So you wouldn't steal from rich,
And give to the poor,
Wouldn't look at The Man
and give him "what for"?
You wouldn't stand up for the needy
the blind and the lame?
Then you're not the solution
you're part of the blame.
Well he is Canadian,
and some say that's a fault.
To ward off his evil,
Turn around and throw salt.
A Canadian you say, the ones who misplace their "u's"?
Well I can't really say that that's much of an excuse.
But I'll cut him some slack and pour him some gin
because I think he likes to eat that disgusting looking poutine.
I disagree about the cutting of the slack,
As he breakfasts by the ocean
And then seconds later while still chewing,
He is hiking on a mountain.
I'd stand up for the needy, and regularily donate,
Canadians are good, the salt of the Earth,
I wish the American's would stop all the Hate,
Your spelling without the "u's" fills me with mirth.
American's - we put the "a" in Hate.
Or so the Canadian has tried to prove
Alas he is just our whiny ol' mate,
We know to American he wants to move.
We don’t always hate, sometimes we’re just picky
I’m sure he can figure it out.
Even though the distinction can be subtle and sticky
If he needs help he can just give me a shout.
And maybe the distinction is obvious and plain
and he doesn’t want to condescend.
So before he can do any Canadian legerdemain
I’ll just say that this is The End.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Random Poems
Random Poems
by Fordy
The first, Doghouse posted "Poem of the Day" and invited everyone to post or write a poem. The second was a little poem for Susan on her birthday; and the third was a little poem for Marie on her birthday.
*********************
*********************
This day in July, not so many years gone by,
Born to the world, with a baby's loud cry,
Susan the snarktastic, the spoiler-world queen!
Hope your day is fantastic, fun and Super keen!
*********************
To our Dear Marie,
by Fordy
The first, Doghouse posted "Poem of the Day" and invited everyone to post or write a poem. The second was a little poem for Susan on her birthday; and the third was a little poem for Marie on her birthday.
*********************
Bring out your dead, wailed out the voice,
Startled he awoke, afraid of his choice,
Before surrendering to grief,
He looked on with Relief
Monty Python's Holy Grail is too loud - rejoice!*********************
This day in July, not so many years gone by,
Born to the world, with a baby's loud cry,
Susan the snarktastic, the spoiler-world queen!
Hope your day is fantastic, fun and Super keen!
*********************
To our Dear Marie,
Please I beg hear my plea,
Sawyer and the gang all say
Have a great day!
Warmest Birthday wishes to you are sent
All Haters can go and get bent!!
Move and Repeat
Move and Repeat
by Fordy, Doghouse
In this exercise, the first person write a four-line stanza. The second person will take the second line of that stanza and use it as the first line of the second four-line stanza and write three new lines for it. Each person will continue taking the second line of the previous stanza and using it as the first line in a new four-line stanza.
****************************************
Summer is here, And the sun is shining,
Sand at the beach is warm and golden,
Once long ago, for your love I was pining,
To you no longer, am I beholden
Sand at the beach, was warm and golden
Winter's set in, covering all with frost,
Passion has faded, no longer do you embolden,
What once was so special, is long gone and lost
Winter's departed, taking all the frost,
Spring has arrived, flowers in bloom,
Eyes afire, dazzling smile; with a look you accost,
Drawn to you I am; my heart you exhume.
Spring has arrived, flowers in bloom,
the days are longer the sun rules the sky.
But I still long for the early sunset gloom
You could ask me to explain but I won't tell you why.
by Fordy, Doghouse
In this exercise, the first person write a four-line stanza. The second person will take the second line of that stanza and use it as the first line of the second four-line stanza and write three new lines for it. Each person will continue taking the second line of the previous stanza and using it as the first line in a new four-line stanza.
****************************************
Summer is here, And the sun is shining,
Sand at the beach is warm and golden,
Once long ago, for your love I was pining,
To you no longer, am I beholden
Sand at the beach, was warm and golden
Winter's set in, covering all with frost,
Passion has faded, no longer do you embolden,
What once was so special, is long gone and lost
Winter's departed, taking all the frost,
Spring has arrived, flowers in bloom,
Eyes afire, dazzling smile; with a look you accost,
Drawn to you I am; my heart you exhume.
Spring has arrived, flowers in bloom,
the days are longer the sun rules the sky.
But I still long for the early sunset gloom
You could ask me to explain but I won't tell you why.
Write a Shortie
Write a "Shortie"
by Doghouse, Fordy
A "shortie" here is a piece of writing that's 100 words or less.
Here are the guidelines:
The theme: Journalism.
The limit: 100 words or less.
The prompt: Real news is everywhere and it’s often depressing. Create some fake news using one of the topics below or one of your own. Funny or serious, your choice.
Suggested news topics:
Unusual weather, Amazing scientific breakthrough, Cat stuck in tree, New continent discovered, Library scandal.
"Novel Crime"
Criminal investigators are currently looking into a reported case of theft from the Minneapolis Public Library after a book was reported missing last Friday. The missing title, “Love Buzz: Soul of the Honeybee”, a collection of poems by local author, I. Ben Stung was last seen by librarian aide Catherine “Cat” A. Logger during her routine daily afternoon shelving.
“I loaded the book on the cart myself” Logger said. “But when I went to put it on the shelf it was gone. Taken.”
This is not the first missing book reported at the new downtown library. Library officials refused comment.
"Weather"
Meteorologists are at a loss to explain the recent deluge of sunshine hitting the city. "They told me when I first moved here that it would rain for 8 months straight, and now here we are in Mid-March and it hasn't rained in weeks. What am I going to do with all of these umbrellas?" local merchant, Ray Needai complained.
The current sunny weather is expected to last into next week, when it could potentially level off into seasonal norms.
by Doghouse, Fordy
A "shortie" here is a piece of writing that's 100 words or less.
Here are the guidelines:
The theme: Journalism.
The limit: 100 words or less.
The prompt: Real news is everywhere and it’s often depressing. Create some fake news using one of the topics below or one of your own. Funny or serious, your choice.
Suggested news topics:
Unusual weather, Amazing scientific breakthrough, Cat stuck in tree, New continent discovered, Library scandal.
****************************************
"Novel Crime"
Criminal investigators are currently looking into a reported case of theft from the Minneapolis Public Library after a book was reported missing last Friday. The missing title, “Love Buzz: Soul of the Honeybee”, a collection of poems by local author, I. Ben Stung was last seen by librarian aide Catherine “Cat” A. Logger during her routine daily afternoon shelving.
“I loaded the book on the cart myself” Logger said. “But when I went to put it on the shelf it was gone. Taken.”
This is not the first missing book reported at the new downtown library. Library officials refused comment.
****************************************
"Weather"
Meteorologists are at a loss to explain the recent deluge of sunshine hitting the city. "They told me when I first moved here that it would rain for 8 months straight, and now here we are in Mid-March and it hasn't rained in weeks. What am I going to do with all of these umbrellas?" local merchant, Ray Needai complained.
The current sunny weather is expected to last into next week, when it could potentially level off into seasonal norms.
Can You Tell Your Life Story In Exactly Six Words?
Can You Tell Your Life Story In Exactly Six Words?
by J.Elizabeth, Marie, Fordy
Once asked to write a full story in six words, legend has it that novelist Ernest Hemingway responded: "For Sale: baby shoes, never worn."
*************************
Some days suck, others are better!
I should have been a blond.
I'm smarter than the average bear.
by J.Elizabeth, Marie, Fordy
Once asked to write a full story in six words, legend has it that novelist Ernest Hemingway responded: "For Sale: baby shoes, never worn."
*************************
Some days suck, others are better!
I should have been a blond.
I'm smarter than the average bear.
The Evil of Dorcas Goodvoiceflute and Libby Cluck
From Buffs - The Evil of Dorcas Goodvoiceflute and Libby Cluck
by Fordy, Susan, Craig, Sue
This started on one email list as a passing joke between Moderator's in the Spoiler-verse, we just forwarded it to EC-S and continued it a little further.
******************
"Mua ha ha" Dorcas GoodvoiceFlute laughed maniacly to herself. "My nemesis Libby Cluck will rue the day he chose to cross me." With a flourish she finished her letter:
Dear Dictator Cluck,Cluck you!The Revolution Awaits!~Dorcas Goodvoiceflute, Leading revolutions since 1961
That will put him in his place. THinking he can charge in and take over my domain. I've been cultivating my evil plots for the last five years, and I won't let him think he can usurp my plans of world domination. My minions are ripe and ready.
*****************
Libby Cluck fumed as he read the latest missive from Dorcas. Who did this upstart think she was. He had watched in horror as she built up her power-base, and as he realized her plans for global domination he had an idea of how he could turn this to his use. First he had to rile her up, and if he blind-copied her minions, perhaps they'd assume he was all about the peace and the love - leaving them ripe for his leadership.
Dear Dorcas,I think you are confused. It is you who is the dictator. Dr. Cluck has no interest in ruling over all of spoilerville- he is a man of and for the people. It is his mission to prevent your dictatorship from growing even further and to enlighten the people about the evil that is the reign of Dorcas. So say we all.Namaste,Libby Cluck, Ph.D, M.D.,D.O, D.M.D, D.O.A
******************
Meanwhile in his secret lair, Fordy the Fordinator of Light (he'd recently been promoted from "Forderama of Exorcism" by The Powers That Be), planned on how best to save the spoiler-verse, and the world from dominion by these two very evil, noxious villains. He'd already managed to rescue Spoiler-Queen Erish from their mad quests for power, but for her to remain safe she had to remain hidden (occasionally sending secret codes to her followers through the facebook interface). With a heavy sigh he sat down at the terminal. At least he had Good and Right on his side, more than could be said of the fascists he was commissioned to battle.
******************
It was time for Fordy to call in his crack-team of trained femme-fatales ... Fordy's Angels. They could sweep in and also help to undermine the evil plots of Dorcas and Libby. It was only the cream-of-the-crop of the Fordy Girls that were promoted to Fordy's Angels.
Alas and unbeknownst to Fordy, there was much dissension amongst his Angels. Each believed she was Fordy's favorite, yet each didn't know that he harbored a secret affection for one who was not yet an angel. Perhaps a demon, but not an angel. What was Fordy to do?
He couldn't betray his Angels for fear that they would turn on him and choose the path of righteousness that Libby Cluck offered them. So he pined away in secret, hoping one day his secret demon love would love him back. Who was that demon? Ah, a secret so deeply buried that only one had that knowledge. For only Fair Queen Erish knew the truth,and she was not about to reveal all until such time as served her purpose. So Fordy sulked back to his Angels and bravely asked their assistance.
*****************
Little did Fordy know that Dr. Cluck had recently kidnapped the Angels to a remote island in the south Pacific. As Fordy tried to call the Angels on the speakerphone at Fordy headquarters, the phone rang repeatedly. "Where are those Angels? They are supposed to be at my beck and call!" Fordy fumed to himself.
He couldn't betray his Angels for fear that they would turn on him and choose the path of righteousness that Libby Cluck offered them. So he pined away in secret, hoping one day his secret demon love would love him back. Who was that demon? Ah, a secret so deeply buried that only one had that knowledge. For only Fair Queen Erish knew the truth,and she was not about to reveal all until such time as served her purpose. So Fordy sulked back to his Angels and bravely asked their assistance.
*****************
Little did Fordy know that Dr. Cluck had recently kidnapped the Angels to a remote island in the south Pacific. As Fordy tried to call the Angels on the speakerphone at Fordy headquarters, the phone rang repeatedly. "Where are those Angels? They are supposed to be at my beck and call!" Fordy fumed to himself.
Meanwhile on a remote island in the south Pacific, the Angels were sitting on the beach and wondering where their drinks were....
*****************
"This is Agent Chienmaison, IMOM reporting in. Apparently there's trouble afoot in the Spoiler-Verse. Someone's getting ready to make a grab for power, I'm just not sure who ..."
*****************
*****************
To be Continued .... ???
Story Starter - Writing Prompt
Writing Prompt
by Fordy, Marie
This started with a writing prompt of the first sentence. It never really went anywhere, and never generated a lot participation ...
She SO did not want to be here, especially when . . .
... he was here too, watching her from across the room. And the asshole had the nerve to give her that self-satisfying smug look. Randy knew his presence at the wedding would bother his ex-girlfriend, Amanda, but he had to see her one more time.
by Fordy, Marie
This started with a writing prompt of the first sentence. It never really went anywhere, and never generated a lot participation ...
She SO did not want to be here, especially when . . .
... he was here too, watching her from across the room. And the asshole had the nerve to give her that self-satisfying smug look. Randy knew his presence at the wedding would bother his ex-girlfriend, Amanda, but he had to see her one more time.
Things had ended so badly between them, he needed her to understand. It wasn't his fault. He would make her understand one way or another.
Amanda turned to Mike, who had been sitting beside her oblivious to the turmoil raging inside of her. "Mike, I hate to impose, but could you ..."
" ... just stay with me. Randy's over there, and did you see that look he gave me? And he's got something under his coat ..."
Randy glanced in Amanda's direction and saw her discussing something serious with Mike. What was he thinking coming here? He knew it was hopeless, but he felt he had no choice.
Alphabet Game - #2
Alphabet Game
by Fordy, Doghouse, Craig, JoLayne, J. Elizabeth, Sue, Marie
We have done somehting like this before, but why not recycle it. Each sentence has to start with the next letter of the alphabet. (The first sentence would start with A, the second with B, the third with C and so on).
Ashamed, he quietly turned and fled the scene.
Before he knew it, the police were chasing after him.
Can’t anyone take a joke anymore?
"Dammit", he thought as he heard the police behind him, "apparently not".
Embarassed, he realized he had left his pants at the scene of the crime.
Fred was not trying to offend anyone.
"Great", Fred said aloud scaring the dog that was sniffing the heel of his shoe. "Now what do I do, go back for the pants or run the risk of offending the line of ladies waiting to get into Annie's Tea Room?"
Hearing the handcuffs the police officer removed from his belt, Fred turned around and smiled at the officer. "I don't suppose you'd let me go back for my pants"?
"I don't think so, bub, but I do have a pair of pantyhose in the cruiser I'm more than happy to loan you.”
Jail wasn't so bad the last time, Fred thought to himself. It is certainly better than Annie's tea room!
Keenly aware that he was in danger of showing his bits to the ladies in line, Fred backed slowly towards the officer. "I'm ready...let' s go. Can we stop at Burger King on the way? I am starving."
"Let's go", the police officer said as he grabbed Fred and put him in the police cruiser, all the while thinking that he could go for a nice, juicy Whopper.
Manacled to the back seat of the cruiser, Fred summoned the dark, supernatural powers of his mind and used them to take control of the police officer's body.
Nora, annoyed because Fred was late meeting her at Annie’s Tea Room once again, flipped her cell phone open and droned, “Have you heard from him?”
Outside Annie's Tea Room the forces of the dark had gathered in response to Fred's telepathic summons and gazed hungrily at Nora.
"Please Fred, enough of your forces of dark. What kind of trouble have you gotten yourself into this time?" Nora glared irritaded at Fred's gathered forces of dark.
"Quiet, bitch, your henpecking days are numbered" Fred growled a smile, displaying his new dark magic-enhanced canines. Something about tasting her fear were the last words Nora heard before she felt Fred's teeth sink into her throat. She would have screamed if she still had a larynx.
Ray (the police officer), snapped back to reality, "What the hell had this naked guy done to him?", glancing at Fred, he noticed he appeared to be drooling from his mouth; as if he was in some other-worldly feeding.
Suddenly Ray the Police Officer felt afraid. Very afraid.
To be continued ... ????
by Fordy, Doghouse, Craig, JoLayne, J. Elizabeth, Sue, Marie
We have done somehting like this before, but why not recycle it. Each sentence has to start with the next letter of the alphabet. (The first sentence would start with A, the second with B, the third with C and so on).
Ashamed, he quietly turned and fled the scene.
Before he knew it, the police were chasing after him.
Can’t anyone take a joke anymore?
"Dammit", he thought as he heard the police behind him, "apparently not".
Embarassed, he realized he had left his pants at the scene of the crime.
Fred was not trying to offend anyone.
"Great", Fred said aloud scaring the dog that was sniffing the heel of his shoe. "Now what do I do, go back for the pants or run the risk of offending the line of ladies waiting to get into Annie's Tea Room?"
Hearing the handcuffs the police officer removed from his belt, Fred turned around and smiled at the officer. "I don't suppose you'd let me go back for my pants"?
"I don't think so, bub, but I do have a pair of pantyhose in the cruiser I'm more than happy to loan you.”
Jail wasn't so bad the last time, Fred thought to himself. It is certainly better than Annie's tea room!
Keenly aware that he was in danger of showing his bits to the ladies in line, Fred backed slowly towards the officer. "I'm ready...let' s go. Can we stop at Burger King on the way? I am starving."
"Let's go", the police officer said as he grabbed Fred and put him in the police cruiser, all the while thinking that he could go for a nice, juicy Whopper.
Manacled to the back seat of the cruiser, Fred summoned the dark, supernatural powers of his mind and used them to take control of the police officer's body.
Nora, annoyed because Fred was late meeting her at Annie’s Tea Room once again, flipped her cell phone open and droned, “Have you heard from him?”
Outside Annie's Tea Room the forces of the dark had gathered in response to Fred's telepathic summons and gazed hungrily at Nora.
"Please Fred, enough of your forces of dark. What kind of trouble have you gotten yourself into this time?" Nora glared irritaded at Fred's gathered forces of dark.
"Quiet, bitch, your henpecking days are numbered" Fred growled a smile, displaying his new dark magic-enhanced canines. Something about tasting her fear were the last words Nora heard before she felt Fred's teeth sink into her throat. She would have screamed if she still had a larynx.
Ray (the police officer), snapped back to reality, "What the hell had this naked guy done to him?", glancing at Fred, he noticed he appeared to be drooling from his mouth; as if he was in some other-worldly feeding.
Suddenly Ray the Police Officer felt afraid. Very afraid.
To be continued ... ????
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Alphabet Game
Alphabet Game
by Fordy, Doghouse, Susan, JoLayne, J. Elizabeth, Sue, Marie
Each sentence has to start with the next letter of the alphabet. (The first sentence would start with A, the second with B, the third with C and so on).
"Amazing!" Beatrice thought to herself, as she surveyed the view spread before her.
Behind her stood Carl and Deborah, rolling their eyes at her melodramatic ravings.
"Couldn't they understand," Beatrice thought to herself?
"DOW's back over 7,000 again," Deborah pointed out. “So? We have a long way to go.”
"Even with the Dow rising we still need money and we need it fast if we're gonna carry through with our original plans," muttered Carl.
"For God's sake, Bea," Deborah exclaimed. "Put your iphone away and focus." She looked at Carl's checklist. "Carl? Why do we need a gun?"
"Gun, uh, ummm ... What gun? This gun. Umm, uh, I don't know how it got here..." Carl stammered.
"How dare you lie to me?", Deborah spat and turned to the window and watched the street below.
Ichabod looked at the three of them and thought, "I have to save Humanity with this lot?"
"Just my luck", Ichabod thought as he stubbed out his cigarette and stood to face the room and give the three of them the bad news that would change their lives forever.
"Knives! Duck!", yelled Carl before Ichabod could say more.
Long before any of them could move, a duck holding razor sharp knives flew in through the window and stabbed Carl in the right eye. Deborah screamed and held her hands over her face as the duck flew around the room and back out the window.
Meanwhile, in another location an ancient darkness stirred, "My Mallard of Doom has drawn first blood! Mua ha ha ha!"
"North, you idiot, I told you to fly NORTH and kill, you limp-beaked bastard!", the Ancient Darkness cursed in ancient darkness.
"Obviously we're going to need this," Beatrice mumbled as she pried Carl's Glock from his cold, dead hand.
"Pass me the Saber Saw. We are going to need that too."
"Quite the pleasure device you have there, Ichabod", Deborah said huskily, "but shouldn't we remove the blade before we, you know?"
"Right, I guess... but that sounds boring to me," Ichabod smirked.
"Seriously you two, now is not the time," Beatrice said with resolve, "Carl lies dead not two feet from you, we must formulate a plan and take action!"
"That's it, you're not the boss of me, I'm leaving!" Ichabod screamed.
"Until we know for sure what is outside of these doors, no one crosses that threshold," Beatrice said to Ichabod.
"Voltex Industries," Deborah exclaimed excitingly, pointing out the window at a large van pulling into the parking lot of the Bellagio Hotel.
"Xavier!" She yelled, looking back at Ichabod and Beatrice, "Xavier is driving the van!"
"You have got to be kidding me!" Ichabod remarked, "Has he infiltrated them, or has he turned Benedict? All of our preparations could be for naught!"
"Zig zag all you want, Ichabod. I think everyone in this room knows who the real infiltrator is!"
"Alright! Alright! I admit it. It has been me! Me! this whole time," Ichabod laughed with an evil glint in his eye.
"BASTARD!" Deborah snarled, "And to think what I almost did with your .... saber saw!"
"Carl probably knew about you working with the Ancient Darkness," Beatrice accused, raising the gun to Ichabod's forehead.
"Did you kill him thinking we'd never figure that out?"
"Everyone knew the truth.. you were all just hiding from it" Icabod said,scornfully.
"Frak that Ichy!" Beatrice snarled, "you turned traitor for your own glory, thinking you'll be able to carve out a name for yourself under the totalitarian regime of the Ancient Darkness; you fail to realize that he wants destruction for everyone, including his boot-lickers!!!"
"God Bea, it's always the same conspiracy crap with you isn't it! Get a grip. And quit calling me Ichy!" Ichabod snarled right back!
"Holy Hell Ichy! Pull yourself together. There is a massive conspiracy going on and you need to realize it." Beatrice rubbed the back of her hand against her forehead.
Ichabod saw his chance and grabbed the gun from her hands and wrestled her to the floor.
Jarred by the impact of Beatrice hitting the floor, an antique porcelain vase tottered and fell off the counter catching Ichabod in the back of the head.
"Keystone Kops if ever I've seen them," a voice intoned as the door opened. Xavier entered and purveyed the scene before him.
Laughter, a deep menacing laughter, echoed through the room; filling our intrepid heroes with a foreboding doom.
"M...m... maggots?" Xavier cried as he backpedaled to escape the room and flee from the billions of wiggling larvae, some as large as two feet long, and all looking toward the now open door.
Noting Xavier's apparent discomfort at the squirming larve, Ichabod chuckled to himself. "If you are afraid of those small creatures, wait to see what I have planned for you next," he sneered.
“Oy vey! I didn’t sign up for this!” Deborah intoned.
“Pray you don’t look like lunch,” the menacing voice bellowed.
"Quickly everyone! If we don't act now all will be lost."
"Run all you want; it will do no good." Ichabod intoned, as he surveyed the scene. Carl's lifeless body still lay in the corner, Xavier quivered in fear and disgust at the door, Beatrice sat stunned on the floor not 2 feet from him; but where had Deborah gotten to?
"Saw this!!!" deborah cried as she lunged at ichabod with the saber saw, severing his head from his body.
Thunk, Ichabod's head hit the floor.
"United, we must be united; it's our last chance!" Beatrice wimpered as she slowly rose to her feet.
Valiant is how they felt! Nothing could stop them now!
Wonderous was their feeling of pride.
"Xinjiang, Xinjiang China is where we shall go!" Deborah then shouted!
"You're out of your mind!", Beatrice said. "Zimbabwe, maybe?"
And so it goes...... The End.
"but ... But was Ichabod the Ancient Darkness or his minion? We thought he was on our side, and he wasn't; what were we trying to accomplish?"
"Close your eyes and try not to think on it too much."
"Dammit - I want answers, and a conclusion. All these plot threads dropped for convenience, I don't understand" Deborah wailed.
"Enough! It was a metaphorical fight against the evil that threatens to consume us all. By stopping Ichabod, and standing up for justice and mercy and compassion we vanquished the Ancient Darkness for another day."
"Finshed then? it's all finished, and we can attempt to start anew?"
"Gads - that's what I've been telling you,"
"Honestly, I'm still a little confused - what about the crow?"
"I'm telling you - it was a manfestation of the evil inherent in mankind's collective soul. We stood against it, and in that act alone we won."
"Just standing up to it brought us victory?"
"Kind of."
Light surrounded them, as if a switch had been thrown.
"My my, what did I miss?" Carl asked!"
"Nyah!" Deborah excalimed, "Your Dead!!!!"
"Obviously, with the Ancient Darknesses power vanquished, the evil he commited is undone; and Carl lives again!"
"Please don't go into more of this; my head is spinning, I don't understand ..."
"Quiet, you'll give yuorself an anuerism trying to puzzle it all out."
"Really what you're saying is if we think of it as a shared hallucination we'll be able to move on with our lives, as opposed to pondering the unrealness of the entire event?"
"Seriously though, I think the memories of the last few weeks will fade over time; and it will all seem a dream."
"Think about it though, we were drawn from our seperate lives into this whole thing; and now if our memories fade, will that sever the relationships we've forged in this endeavor?"
"Unfortunately I'm sure that will be a side-effect ....." Beatrice trailed off.
"Very well then, my newly found and soon to be lost friends, fair thee well."
"Well then, I guess this is goodbye."
Xenon gases appeared to gather and shimmer in the air as the party said their goodbyes and went thier seperate ways.
"You may have defeated me this time, but there will be new champions and other battles ..." the Ancient Darknesses voice whispered into the night.
Ze End!
by Fordy, Doghouse, Susan, JoLayne, J. Elizabeth, Sue, Marie
Each sentence has to start with the next letter of the alphabet. (The first sentence would start with A, the second with B, the third with C and so on).
"Amazing!" Beatrice thought to herself, as she surveyed the view spread before her.
Behind her stood Carl and Deborah, rolling their eyes at her melodramatic ravings.
"Couldn't they understand," Beatrice thought to herself?
"DOW's back over 7,000 again," Deborah pointed out. “So? We have a long way to go.”
"Even with the Dow rising we still need money and we need it fast if we're gonna carry through with our original plans," muttered Carl.
"For God's sake, Bea," Deborah exclaimed. "Put your iphone away and focus." She looked at Carl's checklist. "Carl? Why do we need a gun?"
"Gun, uh, ummm ... What gun? This gun. Umm, uh, I don't know how it got here..." Carl stammered.
"How dare you lie to me?", Deborah spat and turned to the window and watched the street below.
Ichabod looked at the three of them and thought, "I have to save Humanity with this lot?"
"Just my luck", Ichabod thought as he stubbed out his cigarette and stood to face the room and give the three of them the bad news that would change their lives forever.
"Knives! Duck!", yelled Carl before Ichabod could say more.
Long before any of them could move, a duck holding razor sharp knives flew in through the window and stabbed Carl in the right eye. Deborah screamed and held her hands over her face as the duck flew around the room and back out the window.
Meanwhile, in another location an ancient darkness stirred, "My Mallard of Doom has drawn first blood! Mua ha ha ha!"
"North, you idiot, I told you to fly NORTH and kill, you limp-beaked bastard!", the Ancient Darkness cursed in ancient darkness.
"Obviously we're going to need this," Beatrice mumbled as she pried Carl's Glock from his cold, dead hand.
"Pass me the Saber Saw. We are going to need that too."
"Quite the pleasure device you have there, Ichabod", Deborah said huskily, "but shouldn't we remove the blade before we, you know?"
"Right, I guess... but that sounds boring to me," Ichabod smirked.
"Seriously you two, now is not the time," Beatrice said with resolve, "Carl lies dead not two feet from you, we must formulate a plan and take action!"
"That's it, you're not the boss of me, I'm leaving!" Ichabod screamed.
"Until we know for sure what is outside of these doors, no one crosses that threshold," Beatrice said to Ichabod.
"Voltex Industries," Deborah exclaimed excitingly, pointing out the window at a large van pulling into the parking lot of the Bellagio Hotel.
"Xavier!" She yelled, looking back at Ichabod and Beatrice, "Xavier is driving the van!"
"You have got to be kidding me!" Ichabod remarked, "Has he infiltrated them, or has he turned Benedict? All of our preparations could be for naught!"
"Zig zag all you want, Ichabod. I think everyone in this room knows who the real infiltrator is!"
"Alright! Alright! I admit it. It has been me! Me! this whole time," Ichabod laughed with an evil glint in his eye.
"BASTARD!" Deborah snarled, "And to think what I almost did with your .... saber saw!"
"Carl probably knew about you working with the Ancient Darkness," Beatrice accused, raising the gun to Ichabod's forehead.
"Did you kill him thinking we'd never figure that out?"
"Everyone knew the truth.. you were all just hiding from it" Icabod said,scornfully.
"Frak that Ichy!" Beatrice snarled, "you turned traitor for your own glory, thinking you'll be able to carve out a name for yourself under the totalitarian regime of the Ancient Darkness; you fail to realize that he wants destruction for everyone, including his boot-lickers!!!"
"God Bea, it's always the same conspiracy crap with you isn't it! Get a grip. And quit calling me Ichy!" Ichabod snarled right back!
"Holy Hell Ichy! Pull yourself together. There is a massive conspiracy going on and you need to realize it." Beatrice rubbed the back of her hand against her forehead.
Ichabod saw his chance and grabbed the gun from her hands and wrestled her to the floor.
Jarred by the impact of Beatrice hitting the floor, an antique porcelain vase tottered and fell off the counter catching Ichabod in the back of the head.
"Keystone Kops if ever I've seen them," a voice intoned as the door opened. Xavier entered and purveyed the scene before him.
Laughter, a deep menacing laughter, echoed through the room; filling our intrepid heroes with a foreboding doom.
"M...m... maggots?" Xavier cried as he backpedaled to escape the room and flee from the billions of wiggling larvae, some as large as two feet long, and all looking toward the now open door.
Noting Xavier's apparent discomfort at the squirming larve, Ichabod chuckled to himself. "If you are afraid of those small creatures, wait to see what I have planned for you next," he sneered.
“Oy vey! I didn’t sign up for this!” Deborah intoned.
“Pray you don’t look like lunch,” the menacing voice bellowed.
"Quickly everyone! If we don't act now all will be lost."
"Run all you want; it will do no good." Ichabod intoned, as he surveyed the scene. Carl's lifeless body still lay in the corner, Xavier quivered in fear and disgust at the door, Beatrice sat stunned on the floor not 2 feet from him; but where had Deborah gotten to?
"Saw this!!!" deborah cried as she lunged at ichabod with the saber saw, severing his head from his body.
Thunk, Ichabod's head hit the floor.
"United, we must be united; it's our last chance!" Beatrice wimpered as she slowly rose to her feet.
Valiant is how they felt! Nothing could stop them now!
Wonderous was their feeling of pride.
"Xinjiang, Xinjiang China is where we shall go!" Deborah then shouted!
"You're out of your mind!", Beatrice said. "Zimbabwe, maybe?"
And so it goes...... The End.
"but ... But was Ichabod the Ancient Darkness or his minion? We thought he was on our side, and he wasn't; what were we trying to accomplish?"
"Close your eyes and try not to think on it too much."
"Dammit - I want answers, and a conclusion. All these plot threads dropped for convenience, I don't understand" Deborah wailed.
"Enough! It was a metaphorical fight against the evil that threatens to consume us all. By stopping Ichabod, and standing up for justice and mercy and compassion we vanquished the Ancient Darkness for another day."
"Finshed then? it's all finished, and we can attempt to start anew?"
"Gads - that's what I've been telling you,"
"Honestly, I'm still a little confused - what about the crow?"
"I'm telling you - it was a manfestation of the evil inherent in mankind's collective soul. We stood against it, and in that act alone we won."
"Just standing up to it brought us victory?"
"Kind of."
Light surrounded them, as if a switch had been thrown.
"My my, what did I miss?" Carl asked!"
"Nyah!" Deborah excalimed, "Your Dead!!!!"
"Obviously, with the Ancient Darknesses power vanquished, the evil he commited is undone; and Carl lives again!"
"Please don't go into more of this; my head is spinning, I don't understand ..."
"Quiet, you'll give yuorself an anuerism trying to puzzle it all out."
"Really what you're saying is if we think of it as a shared hallucination we'll be able to move on with our lives, as opposed to pondering the unrealness of the entire event?"
"Seriously though, I think the memories of the last few weeks will fade over time; and it will all seem a dream."
"Think about it though, we were drawn from our seperate lives into this whole thing; and now if our memories fade, will that sever the relationships we've forged in this endeavor?"
"Unfortunately I'm sure that will be a side-effect ....." Beatrice trailed off.
"Very well then, my newly found and soon to be lost friends, fair thee well."
"Well then, I guess this is goodbye."
Xenon gases appeared to gather and shimmer in the air as the party said their goodbyes and went thier seperate ways.
"You may have defeated me this time, but there will be new champions and other battles ..." the Ancient Darknesses voice whispered into the night.
Ze End!
Merry Christmas EC-Spoilers
Merry Christmas EC-Spoilers
by Fordy
Twas the Night Before Christmas, And all through the list
Gearing up for Holiday Cheer, making sure nothing was missed,
Susan in Iowa, boxed up some snow,
To Doghouse she sent it, all wrapped with a bow.
Elizabeth got some tinsel, and spread it with care,
For Semaht was coming, with eggnog to share,
Rowan sends greetings from New Zealand to us,
Marie's getting someone else to drive the bus,
Jo and her cows, dressed up all festive,
Garvis sends greetings that are a little suggestive,
Lissa called Santa, to ensure he was on time,
JoLayne under the mistletoe, kissed a French Mime
Sue hung the stockings, some here and some there,
Janet brought the wreathes, all decorated with flair
Brian made snowmen, cluttering the yard
Fordy says Merry Christmas, though he's not much of a bard!
by Fordy
Twas the Night Before Christmas, And all through the list
Gearing up for Holiday Cheer, making sure nothing was missed,
Susan in Iowa, boxed up some snow,
To Doghouse she sent it, all wrapped with a bow.
Elizabeth got some tinsel, and spread it with care,
For Semaht was coming, with eggnog to share,
Rowan sends greetings from New Zealand to us,
Marie's getting someone else to drive the bus,
Jo and her cows, dressed up all festive,
Garvis sends greetings that are a little suggestive,
Lissa called Santa, to ensure he was on time,
JoLayne under the mistletoe, kissed a French Mime
Sue hung the stockings, some here and some there,
Janet brought the wreathes, all decorated with flair
Brian made snowmen, cluttering the yard
Fordy says Merry Christmas, though he's not much of a bard!
Roses Are Red - Summer 2009
Another Roses Are Red Poem/Conversation
by: Fordy, Doghouse, Marie
Roses are red, violets are blue,
the temp today is supposed to be 92.
Roses are red, sunscreen and shades I bought 'em,
but I really can't wait, for the cool days of autumn.
Roses are red, it's the second day of summer.
The heat wave's continued, My thought? That's a bummer.
Roses are red, as people cool off in the lake
I really wouldn't mind seeing a nice cool snowflake.
Roses are Red, And you're not too bored
I thought original posted to Blah, So poem was left, ignored
Roses are red, The sun is finally shining
Time to frolic in the sun, Quit your whining
Roses are red, when the weather's this ripe
I like doing nothing more than bitch and gripe.
Roses are red, I'm not too proud to say
weather this muggy just shouldn't be allowed.
Roses are Red, Rain Falls from the sky,
No lake on the weekend, Until the clouds go goodbye
Roses are red, Criminals are violent
Why is everyone else in the group, Staying so silent?
Roses are red, I don't like to cuss
but I want to know D.A., where is my bus?
Roses are red, I don't know what DA's done with the bus,
but while we wait we can watch Desperado with Antonio Banderas.
Roses are red, to answer DA: I don't know why.
The only thing I can think is everyone's shy.
Roses Are red, And I must confess,
After that party, I made a bit of a mess.
Roses are red, The mess was concealed,
I gave it to Otto And hid it in Springfield
Roses are red, violets are blue
everything's been said, so this poem is now through.
Roses are red, before I hit 'send'
I just wanna add ...The End
by: Fordy, Doghouse, Marie
Roses are red, violets are blue,
the temp today is supposed to be 92.
Roses are red, sunscreen and shades I bought 'em,
but I really can't wait, for the cool days of autumn.
Roses are red, it's the second day of summer.
The heat wave's continued, My thought? That's a bummer.
Roses are red, as people cool off in the lake
I really wouldn't mind seeing a nice cool snowflake.
Roses are Red, And you're not too bored
I thought original posted to Blah, So poem was left, ignored
Roses are red, The sun is finally shining
Time to frolic in the sun, Quit your whining
Roses are red, when the weather's this ripe
I like doing nothing more than bitch and gripe.
Roses are red, I'm not too proud to say
weather this muggy just shouldn't be allowed.
Roses are Red, Rain Falls from the sky,
No lake on the weekend, Until the clouds go goodbye
Roses are red, Criminals are violent
Why is everyone else in the group, Staying so silent?
Roses are red, I don't like to cuss
but I want to know D.A., where is my bus?
Roses are red, I don't know what DA's done with the bus,
but while we wait we can watch Desperado with Antonio Banderas.
Roses are red, to answer DA: I don't know why.
The only thing I can think is everyone's shy.
Roses Are red, And I must confess,
After that party, I made a bit of a mess.
Roses are red, The mess was concealed,
I gave it to Otto And hid it in Springfield
Roses are red, violets are blue
everything's been said, so this poem is now through.
Roses are red, before I hit 'send'
I just wanna add ...The End
Fictional News
One idea tossed around was to make up a fictional news-story. In response to a comment in our very own blog from "Danny Gokey - Doghouse's #1 fan". JoLayne and Doghouse took up this challenge.
**********************************************************************************
AP Wire – from 2 minutes ago Allison, the future Season Eight Idol Winner, was furious when it came to light that her rival, Danny Gokey, not only think he will be the season’s Idol winner, but is also Doghouse’s number one fan. “I can’t believe he would say that, let alone post it in a blog. And two months ago… what an ego. I’M Doghouse’s number one fan and two months ago on Idol there was Lil, Anoop, tattoo girl, and Matt. Tough competition. Danny’s lucky to even still be on the show, let alone the Winner.” She continued, “To be Doghouse’s number one fan, you have to yell Arf Arf! There wasn’t one Arf in his whole blog.”
Attempts to reach Danny Gokey at the Idol mansion were unsuccessful. AP helicopters, circling the grounds for a shot of the husky-throated warbler did manage to capture footage of Adam Lambert and Chris Allen comforting Allison, who was unfairly voted out of last night’s Idol telecast, as she packed her bags.
TMZ reports that Britney Spears has been staking out the Idol mansion in search of a man who can actually sing.
**********************************************************************************
AP Wire – from 2 minutes ago Allison, the future Season Eight Idol Winner, was furious when it came to light that her rival, Danny Gokey, not only think he will be the season’s Idol winner, but is also Doghouse’s number one fan. “I can’t believe he would say that, let alone post it in a blog. And two months ago… what an ego. I’M Doghouse’s number one fan and two months ago on Idol there was Lil, Anoop, tattoo girl, and Matt. Tough competition. Danny’s lucky to even still be on the show, let alone the Winner.” She continued, “To be Doghouse’s number one fan, you have to yell Arf Arf! There wasn’t one Arf in his whole blog.”
Attempts to reach Danny Gokey at the Idol mansion were unsuccessful. AP helicopters, circling the grounds for a shot of the husky-throated warbler did manage to capture footage of Adam Lambert and Chris Allen comforting Allison, who was unfairly voted out of last night’s Idol telecast, as she packed her bags.
TMZ reports that Britney Spears has been staking out the Idol mansion in search of a man who can actually sing.
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