Roses Are Red - Part 1

Roses are Red
by: Susan, D.A., Celt, Misty, Garvis, Sue, Doghouse, Elizabeth, Marie

This was a project for the group - everyone was supposed to email Susan a poem using the "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue" rhyming scheme. After waiting a week for submissions she started off with a simple reminder to the list about sending her their submissions. This turned into a game which most of the list joined in on. (We're still waiting for Susan to publish what was actually submitted.)

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,
I only have poems, From a few of you

Roses are Red, Yellow is pee,
I gave you a poem, So you're not waiting for me

Rose are red, Violets smell like poo,
It sounds to me, Like you need something to do!

Roses are silent, and so is the mime,
Two hours left, Until quitting time.

Roses are red, Violets are dirty,
I'll be off in one hour, When it's five-thirty.

Roses are Red, Carnations are black,
If you duck out early, No one will give you flack

Rose are red, It's now dark outside
It's now 5:40... So on home I shall slide.

Roses are red, And it's not even Four,
A little under an hour, Then I'm out the door

Roses are red, It's Six-fifteen,
I'm happy I am home, There's television to be seen!

Roses are Red, Canada's Great
I'll be watching Pushing daisies, Tonight at Eight.

Roses are Red, Iowa is better,
But my apartment is cold, I had to put on a sweater.

Roses are Red, And grow in the Sun,
Why is it only Susan and I, Are having all the fun?

Roses are red, Losers are scared,
They worry because, They are so unprepared!

Roses are Red, Corpses are Black,
Send Susan a Poem, Or she'll give you a smack

Roses are Dead, And shrivelled like hell,
Exquisite Corpse Spoilers, Poems still smell

Rose are red, Flowers are pretty,
Oh can't you see, How our poems are witty?

Roses are red, Your poems are swell,
I read them twice, And let out an elle-oh-elle (Sound it out)

Roses are red, And we both rock,
Still waiting for more replies, From the rest of the flock.

Roses are Red, Books are for reading,
I just returned, From my Weight Watcher's meeting.
Roses are red, NC has Duke,
Dumb ass Sassy, Made a pile of puke!
Roses are red, Sassy is fat,
While away at my meeting, The pile of puke sat!
Roses are red, My family is lame,
I cleaned the puke myself, I have them to blame!
Roses are red, Their heads need pounded,
For leaving the puke, They are all grounded!

Roses are red, What can you say?
Where did they go? Did they all hit the hay?

Roses are Red, Simpsons are funny,
They better apologize, And give you lots of money!

Roses are Red, You skinny thing,
Go tell your husband, To buy you some Bling!
Roses are Red, Sounds like my Ally,
She pukes every morning, As just out of bed I do rally.
Roses are red, The Hair ball is black,
You can't blame Malcolm Girl, that's just a fact
Roses are red, I have no one to ground,
I have to clean it up daily, Before the next wretching sound.

Roses are Red, Nothing like Cassie,
She doesn't puke in the house, She's much to classy

Rose are red, I won't fall for that bit,
I'd rather deal with cat litter, then clean up dog shit.

I know I should start, With Roses are Red,
But at times you were writing, My ass was in bed.

Roses are red, Like the trail of a comet,
Did I really just read, A poem about vomit?

Roses are red, Little chickies go cheep,
I'm still working midnights, So I'm still asleep.
Roses are still red, Now I'd be at work not asleep,
But since we can't access emails, I can't utter a peep.

Roses are Red, I have a big ass,
The puke piles are worse, When they have lots of grass.

Roses are red, Cassie is probably cool,
But as we all know, It is the cats that Rule!

Roses are red, Violets are blue,
If I couldn't respond to emails at work, I'd have nothing to do!

Roses are red, my cats are fat,
They ate all the food in the bowl, and undigested on the floor it sat.

Roses are red, Violets aren't bold,
I go to bed early, Cuz I'm freaking old!

Roses are red, their stems have some grime,
I just have to say, I love standard time!

Roses are red, these messages are fun,
I just had to say, I really liked this one!

Roses are red, puke sounds ishy, but that,
is reason #50, why I don't get a cat.

Roses are red, I didn't mean to seem withdrawn,
but it just so happens, I just logged on.

Roses are red, no email at work?!?
Go tell your boss, that I think he's a jerk.
Roses are red, if your boss screams foul play,
just tell him I'm from Canada, and my name is D.A.

Roses are red, Misty's a bold girl,
and yes, that's right, a rhyme about hurl.

Roses are red, cat puke would make me a grump,
but forget all that, let's talk about your rump.

HEY! Roses are red, the rhyming pattern your suddenly eschewing?
Why? Is it cuz we're suddenly overdoing?

Roses are red, Flowers are green,
My rump is the size, of a washing machine!

Roses are red, Even though quiet as a mouse,
We got rid of our dog, Cuz he wouldn't quit peeing in the house.

Roses are red, the Simpsons are bent,
and not quite as funny, as Arrested Development.

Roses are Red, And Baby's got back,
Enough about your ass, Let's talk about your rack!

Roses are Red, That blame we must douse,
It's not Canada that said it, But Mr. Doghouse.

Roses are red, Fruit has a peal,
Oh yes they are fabulous, and of course they're real.

Roses are red, Isn't that true,
Dogs are just bark machines, Standing in a pile of drool .

Roses are red, That thinking is foolish,
Standard time is really, Just for the Ghoulish.

Roses are red, The kitty you will love,
It's puke will seem, like a message from above.

Roses are red, No, Garvis, don't buy it,
I never shoulda said it, now my karma's disquiet.

Roses are red, the dark's really cool,
and if it were light out at midnight, how could people celebrate yule?

Rose are red, The dark is okay,
As long as it showed up, A bit later in the day.

Roses are Red, Fruit still has a peel,
Now do you mind, If we all cop a feel?

Roses are Red, Your mind is in the gutter,
Go off to a corner, Stand there and mutter.

Roses are red, You seem quite contrite,
It was all in good fun, And not done in spite.

Roses are red, And the gutter is yucky,
We could be in worse places, Like the State of Kentucky.

Roses are red, DA created quite a ripple,
but I agree, and specifically, I'd like to talk about your . . . (Maybe I'd better reassess this one!)

Roses are red, Sucks, the writer's strike,
It does, I guess I'll go out and ride my bike.

Roses are Red, Yahoo's spam filter sucks,
It hung up several message, Those damn Yahoo ... ducks!

Roses are red, The Grass there is blue,
don't talk bad 'bout Kentucky, Or they'll come after you!

Roses are red, try not to fret,
Yahoo's just slow, you've nothing to regret.

Roses are red, what you say may be true,
but looking at cat vomit, might make me spew, too.

Roses are red, but if you crawl under your quilt,
while the sun is still shining, it leads to feelings of guilt.

Roses are red, you raise a good point,
now I'm feeling happy, insert exclamation point (!)

Roses are red, But rhyming can be quite a pain,
When it's government rules, You must try and explain.

Roses are red, Your rump must be shy,
I'm still waiting on a picture. Promised in a My Space reply.

Roses are red, And I must admits,
I liked discussing her ass, And can't wait for her other bits.

Roses are red, I used to work nights,
Sleeping in the day time, Causes no frights.

Roses are red, Now don't you fret,
When you have a kitty, Vomit won't be a threat.

Roses are red, I'd love that little cuss,
but seeing someones puke, makes me ride the porcelain bus.

Roses are red, Used to it, you'll get,
I'll send a sample of Ally's, on the next jet.

Roses are red, I always like research,
but the thought of seeing Ally's vomit, makes my stomach start to lurch.

Roses are red, Ally is black,
Give her daily Vaseline, Then no reason for the ACK!

Roses are red, VASELINE?!?
Is cute little Ally, a vomit machine?
Roses are red, just typing the "V" word,
starts to activate, my feelings of GERD.

Rose are red, Don't worry about a thing,
Ally hasn't vomited, Since the time change.

Roses are red, that's been a long time,
but I just have to ask, what happened to the rhyme?
Roses are red, sage is a pretty light green,
but how do you get a cat, to eat Vaseline?

Roses are Red, It should have been Thang not thing,
But I was tired after gambling, For me no slots would bing.
Roses are red, She's a strange cat,
Eating Vaseline from my fingers, Pretty cool, isn't that.

Roses are red, mantises are praying,
That Ally's a cool cat, goes without saying!
Roses are red, Coltrane played sax,
my friend once had a cat, who ate ear wax.

Roses are red, Used Q-tips are a hit,
Don't take them from the cat, Unless you want to get bit!

Roses are red, larger cats are cougars,
my used Q-Tips, are usually covered with boogers.

Roses are red, I just supply the facts,
but I think every cat, likes the taste of ear wax.

Rose are red, I worry about you,
Q-Tips are for the ears, What the hell do you do??

Roses are red, if you hold the Q-Tips in a certain way,
you can really get . . . uh, maybe I'd better not say.

Roses are Red, I'm feeling sick,
Thinking of you and Qtips, ...Ewwwww.....Ick......

Roses are Red, I think you're confused,
Q-Tips are for ears, But you are excused.
Noses, when "blew", Show boogers so green,
Q-Tips are brown, Once ears are clean.
Once you have "read", This message please note,
The homonym use, In these things I wrote.

Roses are red, This is the only group i know,
That likes to talk about boogers and ear wax, in many, many posts.
Read on if you will, Lets start a new subject,
why not talk about shopping and tax, instead of a snotty nose.
I don't know why maybe it is only because it rhythms,
but it sure sounds more pleasant than green things in your nose.
Tis the season even though Thanksgiving is yet to be,
but Mr. St Nickwas at the mall this past week,
We stopped and we stared, and my 7 year old exclaimed,
with hands on her hips "it's not even December yet".

Roses are red, after you blow out that goop,
sometimes your nostril, just needs a good scoop.
Roses are red, a finger's too big,
and a Q-Tip provides one, with a pretty good dig
Roses are red, and when it's balanced on that stick,
makes that cute little booger, that much easier to flick.
Roses are red, I saw the homonyms next spring,
when I spin a dreidel, you'll know it's Purim.